Please Don't Leave Me

I've always been a nostalgic person. Forever missing what is gone and wishing I could go back in time. These days, nostalgia is so different for me. I see the Fuller House commercials and I miss Full House and I wish I could go be four again at nana and papas house in the summer running in between the backyard in the sprinkler and the house watching old shows like Full House and then I remember "with my auntie" and then it all goes downhill because now I realize I can't just watch a Full House episode to make myself feel better. I lost the one consistent part of my childhood. The one person in every memory. So I just let my mind go numb and stop missing those days because nothing I could ever do will make my life feel normal again. My family will never be the same. My summers will never be the same. My life has had to change and erase this person from all my new memories that she should be a part of. My happy childhood memories go black, as dark as it sounds. I let them fade out. I don't wanna remember a time when I was so blissfully happy because I think I'll never feel that way again. I lost everything the day I lost her.